“What did you want to get out of this hike?” I asked Felix.
“I wanted to stay alive,” she replied.
Today we said goodbye to Boomerang, who drove off to take back our apartment in Seattle today. Work starts tomorrow.
Today we wound our way around Mount Adams, finding view after view of the majestic mountain.
Felix was ready to go home today and I was ready to go back to the beginning, when I didn’t know anything about hiking or packing or weight on my back. I wanted to escape to those days when Boomerang and I took long siestas in the heat of the desert. I wanted to redo my jubilant hike into Kennedy Meadows with Rainbow Dash. I wanted to head back to Etna and meet Felix all over again.
My reasons for coming out here were varied: for challenge, for symmetry, for simplicity, for fun. I found that and more out here. I found friendship and magic and mystery and madness and pain and joy and love. If I searched for the thought that has crossed my mind most on this trip, it would be love. I have meditated on it, talked about it, wrote about it, and felt it growing in myself and others.
Looking at Mount Adams’ sparkling snow in the deepening darkness, I can’t help but agree with Felix. I came out here for every other reason, but I discovered my purpose, the thing that I can live for: love.
It might not be all I need, but it is the thing from which all of my life springs forth and all of life returns to. And now it has become my compass.